nina firda diaries

Sweet November

2008-11-19T11:16:00.002+08:00

Pheew! It's been donkey years since the last updates. I think I need to revisit the last few months of life adventures. So here it goes... *la la la*

- Graduated! Finally *ahaks*! (attending next yr's convo tho)
- Engaged! Happy and very much in love still.. with Darling Fid!
- Employed! Yeah alhamdulillah!
- Saving up for marriage... 121209 here we come.. (insya'allah)
- Yati got married.. CONGRATS again babe!
- That lil' heartbeat.. i hear them Far darling.. *hehe*
- Mega Perdana was superb..
- MIL-to-be was so sweet.. thank you so much fer the souveniers *muacks*
- Planning for Dad's 50th birthday bash!
- Deciding on what to wear fer DND.. Shanghai Night@Fullerton! *rocks*

the list goes on and on.. stay tuned!

The Beginning - JULY 2008

2008-02-25T15:19:00.006+08:00

Fly me to the moon

And let me play among the stars

Let me see what spring is like

On Jupiter and Mars

In other words hold my hand

In other words darling kiss me

Fill my heart with song

And let me sing forevermore

You are all I hope for

All I worship and adore

In other words please be true

In other words

I love you

2008-02-06T11:54:00.000+08:00

The love's so strong.. No one could ever tear us apart..

The Love Pursuit

2008-01-05T14:58:00.000+08:00

Well.. I was re-organizing the pictures in my computer when the idea of compiling our couple photos into separate folders (wrt years) caught me. So here it is.. the love pursuit since 2002.

Love u too!

2007-12-27T15:38:00.000+08:00

Thanks sayang for the sweet post.
I love u too!

Crazy

2007-12-21T08:38:00.000+08:00

Sayang,

I really love you..

So much..

And I'm missing you..

Like crazy..

I really do want to spend time with you..

And I'll make sure I make time for us..

Like I promised..

Even though I might be busy..

But I'm just crazy..

About you..

Anticipating and Anxiously Awaiting

2007-12-06T15:00:00.000+08:00

oooooo... can't wait for tmrw... Di promised me a day full of fun! Happy birthday to me! And thanks darling for the birthday song and being the first to wish me happy birthday! I love you! *mmmuuaacckksss*

Tip #2: Surprises are a MUST! At least for special occasions! It's definitely worthwhile to put in that extra thot into planning THE day to be remembered foreva!

Tip #1

2007-12-05T12:46:00.000+08:00

Hi hi darlings!!

Just got a call from Anna and she's offering me a part-time job at another dental clinic. Woah! $$ $$.. keching keching.. i can hear it coming haha! Anw, right after the call, i rang Di up. And here's contribution to Tip #1.

Effective communication: When u love and trust your love, make sure u do make an effort to inform him/her of ur future undertakings and commitments. It is when u bring tat special someone into the whole discussion of whether u shud carry on doing wateva u tot of doing, is wen tat special someone feels his/her significant existence in ur life. He/She will definitely treasure u more in daes to come.

More Lovin' Coming Ur Waaaayyyyyy !!!

2007-12-05T00:30:00.000+08:00

Heyo darlings!

It's been decades since we posted things up! *gosh* Tis whole year has been a whooping stressful year fer the both of us, having to cope with work and sch. Sayang has secured a wonderful place at Eubiq and I'm done with half semester of M(Arch). Hopefully, the long-awaited graduation will come soon. Do pray fer my success k pals!

We've come to terms wif wat cud be the reason to why we're not posting stuffs up regularly. And we have realised that it all boils down to one BIG question - wat do we write abt today? Sayang feels awkward abt sharing stuffs wif the public especially wen it comes to sharing stories abt his personal life (love life some more). So we've decided that this blog is gonna be abt LOVE! and more LOVIN'!

We hope to share the good words of love and spread the warmth feeling of it around wif stories and kind tips on love. We're not experts in love. We just wanna share! So...

Stay tune... 2008 gonna rawk big time haha!

p/s: tomorrow is the 6th and it's MY birthday. so happy birthday to me (x3) ahah!

Greetings!!

2006-12-22T15:10:00.000+08:00

Merry Christmas one n all!!

Linger

2006-12-11T13:58:00.000+08:00

Be around for me. Stay here wif me. Cross these hurdles wif me. I LOVE YOU.

A GREAT YEAR AHEAD!

2006-12-07T18:37:00.000+08:00

Nong Nong Ago..

2006-06-12T16:20:00.000+08:00

Well.. Feels like its been generations ago since i last posted sumting here.. Guess wat sweetie? I tink d foto looks freakin' cool! N u look damn cute haha! Really!

By d way, I've oredi sent d foto to Nike fer them to use in their promotional ads *sticks out tongue, rolls eyes* *"as if!"* ~Kwang kwang!~

But anyway, i really lurv d fotos.. N i'm glad u lurv d lovely watch! Worth every penny as they say.. Cheerio fer now!

Happy Ending, Fresh Beginnings!

2006-05-23T13:57:00.000+08:00

Hey hey hey..
It's been donkey years since i've blogged anitink! Has been very occupied with lotsa stuff so no time to sit, think and type. Hehe! (..excuses, excuses) Aniwae, life's been pretty smooth sailing since the last time i'm here. My friends are all getting married.. so happy for them. Well, here's the ultimate thing that makes me real proud of moi circle of frens: they get attached for a long time with their partners and they end up being one blessed married couple. COOL rite! Now that stereotyped old stinky curse is outdated. Who says u haf to fall in and out of love umpteen times just to end up with the right life partner? Who says u haf to get married quickly after u get attached to someone in the fear that the love will die off if we dated or very very very long period of time?

Nani's married to Andi.
Yana's married to Faris.
Farrah's on the fast right track... with Fairiz..
Lat's going on real cool.. with Suhaimi...
Lira's comin' in.. with Sulaiman...
Nora Fendi's a legend..
As and ehem ehem.... oso rockin' gud time..
Ads n darl..
Ayuni n darl..
Shidah n darl..
Asnur n darl..
Suraya n darl..
Tuty n Is..
Noris n darl..
Is n Azura..
Is n darl..
Syai n darl..
Juniors and darls..
(and all my darlings wit their darlings that i've accidentally missed out)

And me n sayang!
Yeah!
May my loved ones be blessed with all the gud things in life!

Missing u all so much! Can't wait for 3rd June!
Gentarasa here we come!

LOVE is in the air...

2006-04-29T20:56:00.000+08:00

A Shoulder to Cry On

2006-03-14T14:26:00.000+08:00

the BIG 22

2005-12-08T22:35:00.000+08:00

22 years from now, I'll be 44. Wonder wat will become of me then. Everitink's stil quite blurry now. But one tink fer sure I wanna be spending my life ahead wif sayang. Me turning 22 signals lotsa stuffs gotta be done the right way. No more foolish, hasty, selfish decisions. More of blissful compromises. Tis year's berthday wish is not fer presents but fer lots of prayers to be answered... May Allah bless my loved ones with good health and prosperous future. Insya' allah.

p/s: Thank you all dearest to me fer the thotful n swit berthdae wishes in emails, electronic cards, msgs, n calls. I love you all lots. And sayang, I can't thank you enuff fer the great piece you sang to me. You rock big time sayang!

just us

2005-12-01T18:04:00.000+08:00

Had superb creativity vibes runnin' thru me todae... so while i had to spend the whole day at home (cus i had no plans n ayang has his steersman course at kallang base), i played around wif my favourite Adobe Photoshop. Here are some of the beautiful results haha!

Happiness

2005-05-06T20:17:00.000+08:00

We're together again!
Yeah!
Cepat lah..
Aper lagi nak type?
Hmm...
Friendster nyer gambar biler nak load?
Fotopage biler nak update?
Ntah lah!
I pun tak tahu asal lembab...
Ayang giler!
Ayang ppun giler!
haha!

[to be cont'd]

dialogue between the two spastic lovers..

Let me x-plain moiself...

2005-04-09T17:06:00.000+08:00

Reasons fer being so mean...

1. I noe ur the ONE fer me..
2. Ur takin' donkey years to change fer the better
3. I noe u can do it, tat's why i'm always pushin' u..
4. No one's worthy of me other than the 'changed' u
5. We've shared so much, too much to even let go..
6. I love you, only u and i noe u know it too so do sth pls!
7. We stil haf a long long way to go in tis rlp so let's take things slowly, get to noe each other better and change in wateva way in order to achieve a more well-dserved hepi and smooth sailing life later in the future! yeah!

I LOVE YOU! I STILL DO!!

My Darling..

2005-04-09T00:24:00.000+08:00

Dear.. Nvr did i tink of myself as foolish as i do now.. I've been so stupid.. Haiz.. Please give me a chance.. I noe i dun seem to deserve it n u haf ur doubts.. But Dear.. I'm really certain tat d time has come..

Fer me to grow up into a man.. Fer me to understand u better.. Fer me to put aside my fondness of letting my feelings take ovr me n turn my tots to d simple tings.. I cud nvr imagine sumone being so stupid as to go on a wild goose chase while d matterz at my doorstep..

Sayang.. Dun gif up on me juz yet.. Let me make u hepi..Tatz all i wanna do.. To show u my love, in d bez way possible..

Thank You..

2005-04-04T18:16:00.000+08:00

Thank You Sayang...

Everitink Happens For A Reason

2005-04-03T21:40:00.000+08:00

ur apology's not needed now..
i onli need u to stay strong k..
i noe u'll be able to pull thru', to prove me wrong somedae, one dae..
and i'll be more than anxious, waiting fer that day to come..
u haf my word..

Sorry..

2005-04-03T20:12:00.000+08:00

I'm sorry Dear..
I nvr wanted it to be tis way..
I'll always love u Dear..
And i'll prove u wrong..

Apology

2005-03-28T21:53:00.000+08:00

i'm sorry..
i'm still in lurv..
i love you still dear..
i'm sorry fer being so mean..

IRRITATED LIKE HELL!!

2005-03-26T14:58:00.000+08:00

Ape seyy..

I'm so d*** annoyed wen this happens..

U yg semangat nak jumpa siang..

I suruh u rehat u kata tak nak, tak leh.. wateva!

And den now biler i dah siap, u maseh ngorok!

Itulah.. tak kasi i kol umah u!

I pun bodoh lah...

Ikutkan sangat cakap u tuu.. EGO!

Lain kali kalau dah tak leh bangun, SURUH org bangunkan!

Pat umah u takde org lain ke yg boleh diharap?

Ish!

Nasib baiklah i lum kluar umah!

Ader je nanti i tunggu u mcm org BODOH!

OVER & OVER AGAIN!!!

Merepek seyy!

Untitled as yet.. Any ideas dearie? :)

2005-03-10T21:39:00.000+08:00

Bila rasa rindu datang menyapa kini
Ku hanya menginginkan kau di sisi

Betapa hebatnya cintaku kepadamu
Tak dapat ku luahkan dengan kata

# bridge #

Sejak kau hadir di dalam hidupku ini
Hari-hari ku tiada lagi sepi
Engkaulah yang ku nantikan selama ini
Usahlah kau biarkan ku sendiri

* chorus *
Kasihmu.. Kuasa melumpuh waktu
Senantiasa lembah berwarna melemahkanku..
Hadirlah.. Usah kau berpaling tadah
Cinta sejati yang tersembunyi telah ku temu sudah..

ur the one

2005-03-09T18:46:00.000+08:00

ur the one

and moi onli one

i dunnoe why

and i dunnoe how

u've become a part of me

mo than a part,

my life,

sometimes i wonder

wat is it abt u

tat is so imperfect,

as compared to me,

wat is it abt u tat i haf not changed?

is it wrong to hope to change u

is it reallie fair to do so in love?

but if i dun, i'll regret it,

cus i wanna love u mo every single day and

i noe i can and i will if u change fer the better

and if u change,

it jus proved tat u love me too rite?

den our lives can be perfect

like how we fantasies it to be

i'm crazy

i noe u r too

it's shown thru ur eyes

the way u smile

the way u tear

i love u

every single day

and

in my every single breath

there's u

I'm sorry..

2005-02-25T14:28:00.000+08:00

"Sayang.. I'll always be lovin u ..No matter wat happens.. All i ever want from u is.. STRENGTH and COURAGE.. U can do it.. We can do it!! So smile now k.. And let there be love and mo love to come as days pass us by.. Wipe away ur tears and remorse no mo.."

I noe u feel as if u can trust me no more.. I noe itz bn taking so long.. I'm sorry.. I'm really sorry..

Its a season to be STRONG!

2005-02-24T11:19:00.000+08:00

Sayang..

I'll always be lovin u..

No matter wat happens..

All i ever want from u is..

STRENGTH and COURAGE..

U can do it..

We can do it!!

So smile now k..

and let there be love and mo love to come

As days pass us by..

Wipe away ur tears and remorse no mo..

*listenin' to Welcome To My Life*

2005-02-22T11:17:00.000+08:00

r.e.f.l.e.c.t.i.o.n.s

i dunnoe y i'm feeling the way i'm feeling these few daes..

it's bad, it's sad, it's dull, and it sucks..

even i'm totally clueless abt wat's happening to me..

isit dissatisfaction, isit unhepiness, or isit jus emptiness..

jus anna sit alone, by the beach and watch the sun-set..

perhaps i'm missin' out on the small tinks in this life..

the pleasure of being alone..

but come to tink of it, if i had continued being alone, den

would'nt i be closin all doors to greater hepiness behind me?

hai..

life's full of unpredictable happenins'.. agree?

the best way is to let fate run its own life course while we run ours'..

hopin' very much moi-OWN-self will surface again soon..

i'm sorry dear..

SEBERAPA PANTAS

2005-02-06T22:12:00.000+08:00

Seberapa Pantas

( 1 )

Seberapa pantaskah kau untuk kutunggu

Cukup indahkah dirimu untuk selalu kunantikan

Mampukah kau hadir dalam setiap mimpi burukku

Mampukah kita bertahan di saat kita jauh

( 2 )

Seberapa hebat kau kubanggakan

Cukup tangguhkah dirimu untuk slalu kuandalkan ohh

Mampukah kau bertahan dengan hidupku yang malang ohh

Sanggupkah kau meyakinkan di saat aku bimbang

( korus )

C*****nya

Hanya kaulah yang benar-benar aku tunggu

Hanya kaulah yang benar-benar memahamiku

Kau pergi dan hilang ke manapun kau suka

C*****nya

Hanya kaulah yang pantas untuk kubanggakan

Hanya kaulah yang sanggup untuk aku andalkan

Di antara pedih aku slalu menantimu (ohh ohh)

( ulang 2 )

( 3 )

Mungkin kini kau t'lah menghilang tanpa jejak

Mengubur semua indah kenangan

Tapi aku slalu menunggumu di sini

Bila saja kau berubah pikiran ohhh ehhhh

( ulang korus )

PERGILAH SAYANG

2005-02-06T22:08:00.000+08:00

Pergilah Sayang

Indah terasa bila cinta tercipta

Memadu kasih janji bersama

Bersama-sama melafaz kata cinta

Gurau senda dan tawa berdua

Tapi kini semuanya kenangan

Kau pergi tanpa pesan

Mana janjimu yang kau lafazkan dulu

Hidup dan matimu bersamaku

Rela kau pegi walau hati disakiti

Biarkanlah aku sendiri

Airmata menjadi penawar

Akanku simpan semua jadi kenangan oh... oh... oh...

Pergilah kasih, pergilah sayang

Tinggalkan aku (pergilah sayang)

Biarkan saja kenangan berlalu

Antara kau dan aku

Pergilah sayang

ALASANMU

2005-02-06T22:02:00.000+08:00

Alasanmu

Ikhlasnya hati seringkali disalah erti
Tulusnya budi tidak pernah engkau hargai
Berlalu pergi dengan kelukaan ini
Ku mengalah Ku bersabar

Bertentang mata seolah olah tiada apa
Berpaling muka ada saja yang tidak kena
Mencari sebab serta alas an yang kukuh
Supaya tercapai hajatmu

Manis di bibir
Memutar kata
Meregang tuduh akulah segala penyebabnya
Siapa terlena pastinya terpukau pujukmu, rayumu, suaramu
Yang menagih simpati dan harapan
Engkau pastinya tersenyum
Dengan pengundurun diriku
Tetapi bagiku pula suatu ketenangan
Andainya kita terus bersama
Belum tentu kita bahagia
Selagi tidak kau ubah cara hidupmu

Ada rahmatnya kita tidak lagi bersama
Terasa jauh diriku ini dengan dosa
Ku tinggalkanmu walau tanpa kerelaan
Yang nyata kau tidak berubah

Bertentang mata seolah olah tiada apa
Berpaling muka ada saja yang tidak kena
Mencari sebab serta alasan yang kukuh
Supaya tercapai hajatmu

Manis di bibir
Memutar kata
Meregang tuduh akulah segala penyebabnya
Siapa terlena pastinya terpukau pujukmu, rayumu, suaramu
Yang menagih simpati dan harapan
Engkau pastinya tersenyum
Dengan pengundurun diriku
Tetapi bagiku pula suatu ketenangan
Andainya kita terus bersama
Belum tentu kita bahagia
Selagi tidak kau ubah cara hidupmu

Nyatalah apa yang kau ingin
Selagi kau dapat berkata
Memang begitu sikapmu semenjak dahulu

Andainya kita terus bersama
Belum tentu kita bahagia
Selagi tidak kau ubah cara hidupmu

p/s: LET ME GO!

Hai..

2005-02-01T15:23:00.000+08:00

Hai..

How i miss my Sayang sooo much.. Wish she cud b by my side always.. Ayang, i hope u get better soon.. Juz try 2 take mo fluids n get mo rest k!

How i wish all my probs wud desert me, n let me b a jolly, old fellow.. asyik susahkan Ayang je.. Buat Ayang marah tak tentu pasal..

How i wish.. How i wish.. How i wish..

Hai..

Proud o' My Darl!

2005-01-30T20:07:00.000+08:00

Sayang sayang...

Of coz i'm proud of u.. How many of us can boast of being a dentist's asst? Hehe! Glad u took up d offer.. N i'm so hepi u're hepi wif ur life Dear!

As fer me, i'm glad too i haf a direction in life, except fer d occasional financial setback *sighs*, which i'll try 2 rectify in d times 2 cum ASAP ya! Juz hoping tat evryting goes smoothly y'noe.. Fer now, i'll juz haf to carry on learning as much as i can n contribute 2 d team.. If i sign on pon, lom tau i get to stay in Team Delta.. So i'll juz enjoy my time there fer now!

Well, letz pray fer each other tat our lifes go on smoothly n we achieve our dreams n aspirations.. *Amin*

U GO GERL!!

Me & Moi New Job

2005-01-30T16:23:00.000+08:00

Fer the ferst time, here's my solo entry..
Jus abt me..

Well, after spendin 4 years of my life as a part-time cashier, I now have to deal wif a new grp of people.
In a way, they are my customers, only that they have to go thru and endure a lil' pain before coming back to me to settle their payment.
Haha! Guessed it?
Yup! I'm now a part-time dentist assistant. A totally new experience fer me!
My probational period's gonna end next Sundae. And tat makes me an absolutely fast learner *smiles widely* Now, if u ask me, i'll tell u tat i'm a part-time dentist assistant, and a part-part time cashier. Haha! (corny!!)
Moi sayang mus be very proud of me ait dear?
Life's like tat. Grab every chances tat come before u. Really!
Like sayang, he's aiming fer his boat licence and seargent rank. Den on, he'll try signing on. At least he noes wat he's doin and I love him fer tat!

Hmm.. very pleased lookin' at the way things are goin on in my life rite now. Can never ask fer mo..

Thank you many many Dear!

2005-01-27T22:22:00.000+08:00

10-Q many many sayang!

Fer ur tutelage, had lotsa confidence to sit fer my FTT after tat..
Morale booster lah katakan!
Fer the patience to layankan karenah computer i tuu..
Sampai 5 jam non-stop seyy kiter try to figure out wats wrong eh, akhirnyer hahahaha!
Viruses diagnosed! Prob solved (at least)...

Okielah, tak sabar tunggu u kol.. gimme a ring soon yah!
MMMmmmuuuuaahh!

Sayang!!

2005-01-24T15:03:00.000+08:00

She's

Stubborn,

nasty,

mean,

ordinary,

fierce,

ignorant,

fussy,

impulsive,

unreasonable,

bad-tempered & incorrigible as I am (like u said)..

I love u fer who u r Baby.. Nothing will ever change tat..

Mmmmuuuuuaaaaahhhh!

Hmm...

2005-01-22T13:25:00.000+08:00

im supposed 2 meet ayang 2dae at 2.45 kat bugis.. plannin 2 go sim lim walk2.. but den ayang hasnt called me or msged me since tis morning.. hmm.. i wonder y.. maybe shez bz wif her yger sibs, esp iya..

den she finally ans my kol at ard 1pm.. she sounds teary.. shez cryin.. y sayang? watz wrong? she says itz nothing.. hai.. n im desperate 2 noe.. not being a bzbody but y is she feelin tis way.. im affected too.. tak tenteram beb..

Sempena Hari Mulia...

2005-01-21T23:28:00.000+08:00

di saat kiter bergembire skarang,
pasti ramai yg berduka di tempat lain..
ialah, banyak skali kejadian malapetaka yg tlah menimpa kita manusia..
ini semua serupa dugaan yg tiada kesudahannya..
mungkin suatu balasan, mungkin suatu macam kesedaran buat kite suma..
yg penting, kiter lekas lekaslah sedar akan segala kesilapan kiter,
cuba berubah menjadi insan yg lebih sempurna..
lagi satu perkara, jgn sesekali kiter memikirkan apa yg baik untuk diri kiter saja,
pikir sume org,
baru lebih bermakna hidup kiter nie. Betul.. saya tak bohong..
cubalah kalau tak percaya..

I miss u too huney.. Sooo much..

2005-01-21T19:47:00.000+08:00

My Greatest Lover, Nina..

Do u noe how much i love u? D love tat i harbour in my heart fer u, blooms into feelings so exquisite, d lips of mine fail in their search to express d words from d heart..
I may haf done wrong in d past.. All d fights, d tears, d surprises, d magic box, d pillow case, d frame n so much mo tat we've shared.. N maybe mo in d future.. But all i ask is fer a chance fer me to prove tat i love u..
I'm forever grateful to Him fer uniting us at d crossroads of our lives.. Let's forgive n forget, n never ever regret.. I'm gonna b loving u forever n ever.. Till d end of time.. Till d very last breath.. Till my heart beats no more.. Herez to better times ahead..
Mmmmmmuuuuuuuaaaaaahhh!!!!

Missin' U Like Cwaziieee

2005-01-20T22:39:00.000+08:00

Missin' U Like Cwaaziieee

Tak tahu knape seyy rasa rindu nie teramat sangat these few daes..

I dunnoe whether u feel the same way huney but one ting i'm sure, it feels so argh! I dunnoe how to describe it.

I was counting the daes we've been together.. to be exact, it's already 2 years 5mths and 24 days.. wah! so fast huh! Well, life's been pretty smooth runnin' fer the both of us except fer the occasional fights and arguments.. the grief and the tears, the heartache and the sore eyes, the giggles and the laughter, the gud times and the bad ones, the surprises and the flowers, the forgetting and the forgiving, the bears, the chocs, the cards, the pearl and everitink else... and oso the anus and the arsh-huullss... hehe! And i'm so very thankful to Him tat our paths crossed, we met and fell in love. I love you and I will always do til moi last breath! I noe u feel the same way too Darl (dun be shy)! We'll stay strong and cross all hurdles together-gether k sayang... MMMmmmmuuuaaahhhh!!

"Live each day as tho' it's gonna be ur last cus u'll never noe when tat will ever come"

Those were the daes (II)

2005-01-11T22:29:00.000+08:00

Woah.. Didnt noe i wrote tat much.. D sentimentalist in me shows clearly.. D poetic lover bares his true colours.. I muz b really crazy leh.. Crazily in love wif ma swit, suuuiiiit lady! Hehe!

Sayang.. I cumer nak cakap ngan u.. Lupakanlah Si Anu tu.. Dia tak bermakna pada kita, pada perhubungan kita.. U jgn badi lah k? I pon rasa ape yg u rasakan..

Well, in short, u can forget bout Anu coz in d words of tat cute lil Focker kid, hez an "Arsh-Huuuuuuul".. Haha!

Lurv ya huney!

India Trip 2003

2005-01-10T21:44:00.000+08:00

Those were the daes..

These entries were made by urs truly wen i was in India last year. Sayang, ur love's so genuine and sincere and i noe fer sure i wun be able to find anione as sweet and charming as u.. now wat can i sae abt u.. Ur a lover n u've loved me too deeply.. I love u too much to let u go now.. hais..

Day 1

"Well, itz exactly 8.50pm at d point im starting dis.. D feeling is starting 2 realli sink in.. 12 days without my darling!! AAARRGH! How worse can it get huh? 12 days.. Hmm.. Seems not much if u dun take into acct d fact dat itz worth about 250 hrs! Haizz.. Dis feeling sux.. Im outta sortz man.. Everyting doesnt seem rite! I noe shez d one 4 me.. She noes how 2 make me happy, make me smile, make me laugh, soothe my nerves by driving me crazy all d time.. I go all weak juz by hearing her voice.. N now i cant even talk 2 her at nite.. 4 12 days! God.. Juz cant stop tinking bout her.. Wish i cud b there wif her, wherever she is.. Den i wudnt haf 2 stop myself frm telling how much i love her n care 4 her.. Hehe!! She means so much 2 me man.. Juz love it wen she smiles evrytime i say i love her as i look into her eyes.. So sweet.. Hai.. Letz not get carried away baby, better find sumting to do b4 i go crazy.. Cheers 4 now..."

Day 2

"Ah.. 1.50am n i still cant get my eyes 2 go *bleep* n shut down.. same ting yesterdae man.. *sob* missing her like crazy.. she did dis amazing ting u noe.. turned me into dis "casanova-romeo" typie.. nvr knew i was like dat.. or wait, maybe im like dat but my EGO always saves, errmm, gets in d way.. hehe.. but im happier now dat i've discovered my true self n how 2 really, n i mean REALLYsumone.. to d core.. im juz so happy dat i make her happy n she noes how 2 make me happy too..n i dare say no one else understands me way better den she does rite now.. n im dead serious.. i really tink shez d one 4 me man.. wanna spend my whole life wif her if i cud.. hopefully.. well, we'll see bout dat in d times 2 cum.. for now i'll juz try 2 get sum sleep.. gettin damn awful eyebags.. juz hope shez fine out there.. adios.."

Day 3

"I could stay awake just to hear u breathing
Watch u smile while u r sleeping
While u're far away n dreaming

I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Where every moment spent with u is a moment i treasure

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
Coz i miss u babe
And i don't wanna miss a thing

Coz even when i dream of u
D sweetest dream will nvr do
I still miss u babe
And i don't wanna miss a thing

Lyin' close to u feelin' ur heart beatin'
And i'm wondering what u're dreamin'
Wondering if itz me u're seeing

And then i kiss ur eyes
N thank God we're together
I juz wanna stay with u in this moment forever"

Aerosmith - I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing

I miss u soooo much my dear.. Can't wait to haf u in my arms again..
MMuuuaaaah!

Day 5

"Well well.. Itz noon 2dae n i juz woke up.. Hehe.. Hey man, yesterdae was not my nite man.. My dear li'l sis was usin d comp.. Waited till i fell asleep.. Hehe.. Niwae, finally got sum news frm her yesterdae.. Was i delighted! Ok ok.. It was juz a few msgs but i was so happy 2 hear dat she was safe n sound.. I juz hope dat she got my replies.. Hehe.. I've nvr felt happier in a few days.. But 4 now, haf 2 wait like 1wk+ for her return.. But i'l be waiting patiently man.. To hold her lovingly in my arms again.. Well, dat'll cum later i guess.. D sooner, d better.. Hehe.. Datz it for now i guess n darling, if u're reading dis, juz wan u 2 noe dat im missing u like crazy down here.. herez a kiss for u.. Mmmuuuuuaaaah! Ciaoz..

Day 6

"Fell asleep yesterdae while waiting 4 my sis 2 finish using d comp.. AGAIN! I'm really goin' crazy frm missing her dude.. My days feel so empty without her.. She means so much to me n i dun wanna lose her.. I juz wanna share my life wif her forever if possible.. Shez THE one man.. Cant wait for her return.. I wanna hold her, hug her, kiss her.. Juz spend time wif her.. I love her so much.. more den i love myself.. Shez my first true love.. Hope shez doin fine n d sweater i gave her is of gd use.. Hehe.. Take care my darling.. I'm tinking of u always.. Mmuuuuaaah!"

Day 7

"Hai.. I cant believe itz been only a wk since u've been away dear.. Felt like ages.. D days seems to really crawl wen u arent ard.. Wen u're wif me, time crawls too.. Hehe.. But itz different.. I've nvr felt so lonely sayang.. I really hope to see u soon n feel ur presence in my arms again.. Missing u like crazy.. N i really mean im really goin crazy.. Itz ok if u cant reply my mails.. I was juz glad to haf heard frm u d other day.. Hope u take care of urself my sweet lil princess.. I'll b counting down d 7 days mo.. Hehe.. Till den, i'll b praying dat u reach hme safely.. I'm always tinkin of u.. Love u so much. Muah!"

Day 8

Assalamu'alaikum Sayang..

Thank u soo much fer ur mails.. I almost cried as i read dem.. Well, actually i've been crying since dis morning.. My ust gave me a kol n wans me 2 go to Pahang.. I haf no choice sayang.. I'm so sorry.. I noe we r both looking forward 2 us meeting on Fri but i realli haf no choice dear.. I realli wish i cud talk 2 u now.. I realli hope u kol me ASAP.. Datz d reason y i didnt wanna go.. I wanted 2 b ard wen u got back but itz sumting i haf no control over.. I realli hope u understand.. Hai.. I'm crying oredi.. Damn..

Aniwae, im glad dat u're ok.. So happy dat u called last nite.. Im missing u soo much now sayang.. N im glad my sweater helped.. Hehe! Realli wish i cud b there wif u 2 take in all d sights n sounds.. Wud b sumting realli special.. Maybe one day.. Hehe! Hope u take care of urself fer d remainder of ur trip k dear.. Im happy dat u've been enjoying urself.. I promise u i'll make it up 2 u fer Fri k.. Hope u'll kol me ASAP wen u can sayang.. I realli miss u..

Guess i'll haf 2 stop here b4 my keyboard gets all wet.. Hehe.. Im juz so sorri about all dis sayang.. Sorri i haf 2 break my promise like dis.. Take care sayang.. Im gonna miss u soo much more.. Kol me k.. My warm hugs n loving kisses juz fer u my love.. Muuah!

Firdaus..

Day 9

Assalamu'alaikum Sayang..

I dunno whether u'll get 2 check dis email or not.. I cant sleep lah sayang.. Been tinking of u day n nite.. N itz made worse by d fact dat i wun b ard wen u get back.. I realli hope dat u'll kol me on wed.. I'll b setting off shortly aftr 10pm here on thur.. Sum nites i cry myself 2 sleep.. N othr nites i juz dun sleep at all..
Sayang.. U mean evryting 2 me.. No one can take ur place.. Itz a fact dat there r many othr better gerls out there but darling, u lah seorang yg bertakhta di dlm hati i n i intend 2 make it stay dat way.. No one understands me better.. U juz noe it wen im feeling down.. N u juz do d rite tings 2 make me laugh n smile.. Cant get enuff of u sayang.. Wish u were here.. Went 2 ur place juz now.. Rasa cam sunyi gitu u takder.. Even ur mum
said dat.. N i felt it real deep.. Hai.. Well.. one plus point is dat both of us will haf holiday stories 4
each othr.. Hehe! About d picnic i havent realli sat down n tot about it.. Cant seem to.. Cant do d planning without u lah.. Hehe! Niwae, wen u get back, 1 of d tings i wanna do is watch Lord of The Rings.. d final sequel.. N 4 ur info i won d PC game 4 dat movie.. Won an SMS contest in d new paper..

Sayang.. i'll b praying dat u'll b safe there.. N dat u'll haf a safe journey hme.. N dat our relatnshp will always b a long n happy one, misunderstandings aside.. Kol me wen u get dis msg k? Or wenever u r free.. I'll always love u.. Come back soon k.. Hehe.. Take care my sweet one.. Mmmmuuuaaaah!

Yours Always,

PhEyR-dOwSe =p

Day 10

Assalamu'alaikum Sayang..

I realli hope u get my msgs till now.. If not, den i dunno wat 2 say.. I juz wish u were here.. I noe u can take care of urself but i cant help worrying.. Furthrmore i wun b ard wen u get back.. Cant help feeling guilty either.. I juz wish dat u wud kol me.. Im missing u n i cant even hear ur voice.. But i guess u haf other tings 2 do.. Juz kol me b4 u leave k.. N i promise 2 kol u wen im there.. I'll b back by sun nite.. Den we'll haf lotsa catching up 2 do.. Kan Sayang? I'll b looking forward 2 dat.. Take care my love.. Miss me tau.. Hehe.. My heart's onli 4 u.. Muuuaah!

Kasihku hanyalah untukmu
Hanya engkau satu
Di dalam hatiku
Hanya kau ku rindu
Belaian kasihmu
Menusuk ke kalbu

Menyayangi dirimu
Segalanya bagiku
Kasih hanya kau
Bertakhta di hatiku

Dan kini kau pergi
Tinggal aku sepi
Oh sabar menanti
Walau hanya sementara
Ku tetap pasrah
Resah gelisah

Ku ukirkan lagu
Waktu ku menunggu
Kehadiranmu
Kembali ke sisi

Rinduku tiada terkata
Haruskah ku merintih
Oh Kasih
Hanya dirimu yang ku cinta
Sepenuh jiwa
Untuk selama-lamanya..

Percayalah sayang.. I loved u then.. I love u all d mo now.. N I'll
love u always, with all of my heart..

Love, Hugs & Kisses,

PhEyR-dOwSe =)

Day 11

Assalamu'alaikum Sayang..

So sorry i had 2 go.. But i hope u understand.. Onli acai noes how "susah-hati" i was.. Hehe.. But dun worry sayang.. Itz onli 2 nites, Sunday nite i dah balik n we can start story-telling maybe? Hehe.. Feel much better now aftr ur kol.. Seems like ages.. I was trying real hard not 2 cry.. U sounded a bit too obvious.. Hehe..

It wun b long till we meet ya sayang.. Sabar k.. Cobaan.. =p We'll decide bout d picnic later.. Like i said, havent given it much tot yet.. Therez soo much i wanna do wif u but.. Hehe.. Nak picnic lah, nak nengok lord of d rings lah.. Hai.. Mcm lah i ni eh..

Take care tau sayang.. I'll try 2 kol u wen i can k.. N biler dah sampai S'pore, im praying dat u'll kol so i noe u're safe.. At least wen u get d msgs on ur fone or wen u get dis email.. I was firing on all cylinders trying 2 lepaskan my frus due to missin u.. Sms ur fone altho therez no one who wud reply.. Email u all sorts of crap.. Hehe.. Im realli missing u like crazy!

So wif dat i end dis thingie.. I'll b back soon k dear.. Bukannye jauh.. Hehe.. Take care k.. Dun worry bout me too much.. My loving hugs n kisses juz 4 u.. Muuuaaah!

Lovingly yours,

PhEyR-d0wSe =p

Hmmm.. tats all the emails he wrote to me wen I was in India. Thank God I was there last year.. the tragedy tat hits the world today is merciless, it tore down the hotel where our chereographers had to saty in wen we were in Chennai.. I still keep the fotos showing tat beach fronting the hotel.. My prayers go to those who stil persist, stil hopin, n is fearless of the now future.. we mus b brave.

Moi Day..

2005-01-10T18:53:00.000+08:00

Haha.. Finally, end of d day.. Cam dah lamer tak masuk sini gitu kan.. Seems like a long time since i posted sumting since wat.. 11th Commandment? Hehe.. Nice song kan.. I'm so darn artistically talented.. Nina shud noe.. Rite yang? And i haf 2 say, I'm so very grateful 2 haf such an equally, if not more, talented lover like Nina.. Thanx fer d great surprises, esp d latest one.. Haha! Love ya lots!

Keliru

2004-12-29T23:25:00.000+08:00

Tis is the song sayang wrote fer me.. isn't he swit?!
He serenade tis song to me tis morning, in his study rm.

"Ku cuba untuk memahami
Agar ku mengerti kelakuanmu
Bukannya pertama kali
Kau cuba pergi meninggalkanku

Mungkinkah silapku
Adakah salahku
Tiada ku mengerti
Kau diamkan diri aku pun keliru

Bila kau mula berkata
aku gelisah kerna ucapanmu
Kau mula meraguiku
atas dasar apa ku menyintaimu

Tiada lain yang ku pinta
Hanya balasan cinta
Setulus hatimu
Usahlah kau curiga oh kasih

Hanya dirimu yang ku damba
Tiada dua atau selainnya
Hanya mampuku curahkan cinta
Rela ku korban apa yang ada
Akan ku kotakan janjiku
Agar kau pulih dan sentiasa milikku."

Thank u so much fer the lovely composition.
I LOVE YOU TOO!!

The 11th Commandment

2004-12-26T23:57:00.000+08:00

As I stand here today with the world as my witness,

I pledge to you my undying and everlasting love.

I will stand beside you as your partner,

I will stand before you as your protector,

And I will stand behind you as your solace.

Please spend and end your life with me.

Your lips speak soft sweetness

Your touch a cool caress

I am lost in your magic

My heart beats within your chest

I think of you each morning

And dream of you each night

I think of your arms being around me

And cannot express my delight

Never have I fallen

But I am quickly on my way

You hold a heart in your hands

That has never before been given away

I wrote your name in the sky,

but the wind blew it away.

I wrote your name in the sand,

but the waves washed it away.

I wrote your name in my heart,

and forever it will stay.

Love me in the Springtime,

when all is green and new,

Love me in the Summer,

when the sky is oh so blue,

Love me in the Autumn,

when the leaves are turning brown,

Love me in the Winter,

when the snow is falling down.

Love me when I'm happy, and even when I'm sad,

Love me when I'm good, or when I'm oh so bad,

Love me when I'm pretty, or if my face is plain,

Love me when I'm feeling good, or when I'm feeling pain.

Love me always darlin', in the rain or shining sun,

Love me always darlin', after all is said and done,

Love me always darlin', until all our life is through,

Love me always darlin', for I'll be lovin' you!